5 posts tagged “family”
What's the best practical joke you've pulled or had pulled on you?
Submitted by Mike Schwartz.
This is complete proof that my family is a bunch of smart asses. For 6 months, my brother knew I wanted the iPhone and demanded he work the launch so he could sell it to me. I didn't want to deal with a salesman who was going to try to upsell me a bunch of stuff. I just wanted to come in, buy my phone, and leave. Who better to do that than my brother?
So I wait outside of the AT&T store for 8 hours on the iFriday. I get inside, Cody grabs my phone and tells me the price. I hand him my Visa and he runs the charge.
He looks up at me slowly: "Your card was declined."
My heart jumped out of my throat and I let out a massive gasp. He then started pointing and laughing at me.
"Got ya!"
I remember when I was 14. I remember when my brother was 14. We were both little assholes. In fact, I think everyone is an asshole at 14. The changes that you go through when you are 14, the hormones, growing up, etc. I remember always fighting with my parents over the dumbest stuff. I'm now watching my sister, Hanna, go through being 14, and I am pretty sure she is the worst 14-year-old ever. Not only is she moody, but she is also loud and doesn't know when to shut up.
Today, Hanna came home from school at lunch (she misses at least 1 day a week) with some glorious news: she has accumulated enough demerits, 18, to warrant 3 Saturday schools. Congratulations!
To celebrate this occasion, I thought I'd share some of my favorite demerits from Hanna's record.
Hanna cannot keep gum in mouth. Was told to get rid of it and not chew in my class. She put another piece in during the same period.
Rudeness, talking during presentation after being warned
Hanna has quite an attitude. In the restroom during lunch, she had a bottled drink. I was goign to ask her where she had gotten it, but didnt even get that far. She carried the attitude into the foyer area. I tried to talk with her there and the attitude was all I could see, so I thought if we went back into the restroom where there were fewer people, we could talk. Not good. She apparently wants suspension!!!
Hanna threw a fit in her study hall class. Mrs. Verley told Hanna not to come back to her class during study hall. During study hall Hanna stated, "I am going to pee all over this school if you don't let me go to the restroom."
Hanna back talks and is disrespectful
Hanna was sitting in the booth that had too many students. When asked to move, Hanna refused.
Christmas is over finally. I managed to survive with 0 Christmas spirit this year. I did have more spirit than my father though, whose spirit levels were in the negatives.
Christmas Eve was spent at my grandparents (father's side). Before I could get there, I almost ended up getting arrested for disturbing the peace at Wal Mart. I was rushing around doing last minute shopping, and it was 5:50 and I demanded they let me in Wal Mart since it was 10 minutes to close. The bitch at the front door refused, so I just lost it and started ripping into her. Fuck Wal Mart.
Dinner on Christmas Eve was good (Ham and pie). We also opened gifts and gave my grandmother a TiVo Tutorial so she can keep recording her episodes of Mama's Family. After we left, I went home and started to install my mom's Christmas gift in her car. I got her an XM unit so she doesn't have to listen to the drivel that is streamed through the FM airwaves around here.
Everyone seemed to enjoy the gifts I got them. I got my dad a new Colts pullover jacket, my brother a Netflix Gift subscription and my sister a pink Nikon digital camera.
I rake in 3 xbox 360 games (Table Tennis, Smackdown vs. Raw 2007 and Tiger Woods 07), which will keep me occupied well into late February or March. I also got some new clothes from my sister and brother. Apparently they don't enjoy seeing me wear the same general t-shirt, jeans, track jacket ensemble I have been sporting for the past 18 months. Who knew!
Christmas evening was at my other grandparents and featured 22 people who really don't get along that well: ah chaos! My sister was running around performing The Hanna Show. If you aren't aware, The Hanna Show is where Hanna realizes she has new people to show off around and tries to be funny and obnoxious all at the same time. Unfortunately, my sister is not funny, btu she is very obnoxious.
The line of the night came from my insanely quiet cousin who finally had his fill of my sister, looks over at her and says:
You're a fucking idiot.
Christmas!
After Christmas at the Webers, I headed back home and then went to try and snag some dinner with Jenna at Yen Ching. We got there and were informed they had run out of food. Who runs out of food on Christmas! Defeated, we headed home hungry and just opened gifts. She got me a very nice Bulova watch, an Apple gift card and a new FCUK track jacket (she obviously appreciates my daily clothing ensemble). I got her a red iPod nano.
All in all Christmas was good. I'm glad its over though. Now it's back to work.
Crunch time before WWDC is going to be in full effect over the next five days. Between a lot of work and personal commitments there may not be enough time to sleep (not that I am sleeping much anyway lately. I am so stressed out that I am having trouble sleeping again).
On the professional side of things, I am doing my damndest to get Porchlight out before I leave for WWDC. I am setting the drop dead date to be Wednesday because I want to be able to field the e-mails and support questions for a few days exclusively before flying out to San Francisco for a week. If not Wednesday, then it will have to wait a few days. I am just waiting for my merchant account provider to accept my account. Apparently they are having trouble fathoming why a software development firm who bills $1000 at a minimum for a job would be billing monthly $15 per ticket on average. Ugh.
Besides Porchlight, I am swamped with client work which is a good thing. I need to keep this steady stream of clients going if I want to have any shot at all of moving to Nashville in the next 6 months. After my last post on the subject of moving, I am seriously thinking about just buying a condo or loft downtown instead of renting. I am not sure that is going to be 100% possible at first, but I can definitely see it happening in the next 12-18 months.
On the personal end of my week, I need to focus on packing and the three birthdays that are coming up this week. Most importantly, my grandparents on my father's side are both celebrating their birthdays this week (only two days apart). My grandpa had a heart attack and a quadruple bypass in May (which was one of the contributing factors to panic attack numero dos of the year) so this birthday is extra important. Besides their birthday, Dana is also celebrating her birthday on Wednesday, so I am going to try and take her out one night this week to celebrate. Not really sure what fun things they are to do in Evansville for one's birthday, but I am sure I can find something.
Oh, and I need to pack. I am really bad about getting things like that done. I'm trying to adopt kGTD as a new way of organizing my life. Sadly a Check Off list is no longer cutting it. I've outgrown my own software. :-(
If you could get someone in your life to start a blog, who would it be and why?
I am not sure there is anyone left in my family that i would actually want to blog. Most everyone has given it a shot. My dad had a blog for about two weeks in an attempt to stop drinking and lose weight. My brother had his blog for about a year before he grew tired of it. My sister has her MySpace blog, which she doesn't even need (thirteen year olds do nothing but gossip about their friends which is just asking for trouble). My mom had a semi-popular blog for a while where she documented the trials and tribulations of my family. Sadly, she doesn't really update it much anymore.
So, I would vote for my mom to return to blogging.
Peacock Drama
http://www.peacockdrama.com
